Book Reading #22 - Coming of Age in Samoa

Chapter 7: Formal Sex Relations

Summary

The first attitude of girls towards boys is of avoidance. This continues up to the age of thirteen or fourteen. Children at this age meet at informal parties and at community reef fishings. However, this exposure is not sufficient nor long enough to teach girls co-operation or real appreciation of personality in members of opposite sex. Some sexual relations like love life of a older man and a young girl do take place but they are outside of the recognized forms into which sex relations fall. An affair between a boy and the girl, nearly of the same age is acceptable by the society and often leads to marriage.

The chapter also talks about the boys confidant or the soa. A boy needs to be wise while choosing a soa, since he/she needs to be loyal. Most common choices are usually a brother or another girl. It's the task of the soa to sing his friend's praise, counteract the girl's fears and appoint a rendezvous. Some times the boy stealthily crawls into the girls house during night and this sex activity is called meototolo. If caught, no girl will ever pay any attention to him again. Finally, marriages are much more formal. There is an exchange of property and the girl's and boy's parents must be willing. Concept of celibacy is absolutely meaningless to them but virginity definitely adds to a girl's attractiveness. However, virginity is a legal requirement for a taupo which is why she is always carefully guarded.

Discussion

It was interesting to know that the behavior of adolescents in samoa is actually quite similar to adolescents in any developed civilization. This makes me believe that the clandestine meetings, sneaking out of the houses during night etc. had nothing to do with the cultural impact, rather it's sheer human nature. The Samoans did the exact same things that an American teenager would try to do even though the Somoans do not have exposure to the internet, television, radio, or the newspapers.